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Thursday, April 21, 2005

PLAYING THE GAME 

And some folks were concerned about Hispanic assimilation into American culture! It appears the Castro brothers of San Antonio have bought the whole enchilada, or in their case, the whole Big Mac and a side order of lies.

The rationalization about being a twin is first rate, worthy of a George II. And the statement about not intending a deception, that gets the Bill Clinton Cajones Grandes award for bald faced lying in the presence of a semen stained dress.

No problemo aqui. These guys are true blue American politicians right down to their red, white and blue canary swallowing smiles.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

PUTIN POWER 

Take one look at this picture and tell me this guy and George II, left alone in the same room, isn't the biggest mismatch since the Titanic and a certain iceberg.

Mr. KGB vs. Mr. AWOL

We're lucky its Condi doing the talking.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

SAFETY LAST, PLUNDER FIRST 

The next time you're asked to take off your shoes, ask the TSA employee if they've pumped some iron at the company gym, used the towel service or watched any cable TV lately.

Rhetorical question: Should these criminals be tried as traitors?

POPE BENEDICT DEATH WATCH BEGINS 

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss....except he's a German and only 6 years younger than his late predecessor. Ratzinger's 78 (that's 337 in Pope years) so we might as as well get started on the dead pool. I give him 3 years, tops.

JP II's top dog on church dogma is now the new Pope. Ratzinger was Woyjtyla's Karl Rove, feeding him the public message while disciplining the troops in reactionary doctrine. How exciting can that be for all those Catholics who were hoping the church might dip a reluctant toe into the 21st Century? Break's over, back on yer heads!!!

That 6.3 Richter reading on the continent was Martin Luther thrashing in his permament cold storage.

Keep those condoms out of Africa and make sure the basket gets passed twice on Xmas for all the little AIDS orphans who might not be flying solo if Trojans weren't a sin.

CANDY SWITCHED TEAMS 

I have given this considerable thought and have to conclude that John Candy never died of a heart attack. His alleged death was a diversion as he underwent a sex change operation and re-emerged as a reporter with CNN.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

THE SPORT OF THE 21st CENTURY 

Rather than just taking a checklist, I think sneaking a pint in one's pants and taking a drink (a la the "Hi, Bob" game) when coming into contact with target would be much more entertaining.

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