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Thursday, May 06, 2004

WHERE'S TRUMP WHEN HE'S NEEDED? 

Is anyone in George II's inner circle of loyalists subject to a pink slip? (No Condi jokes, too easy). Sure, Christy Whitman and Paul O’Neill got shown the door, but they didn't tow the company line like Donald Rumsfeld and George Tenet.

Tenet remains CIA Director after telling the president that WMDs were a "slam dunk". Obviously, white CIA director's can't jump because his 'dunk' clanged off the rim to the tune of $100 billion dollars plus and more than 700 dead American service personnel. Not a single WMD has been uncovered. Why does he have a job?

Not only did the Secretary of Defense insisted on having a thoroughly unprepared Pentagon oversee the occupation of Iraq , he has demonstrated a myopia that has left Iraq in a dystopia, not likely to be confused with the democratic utopia the administration was counting on. So why does he have a job, especially after it's revealed that the forces under his command had been playing Saddam, Jr. in the ex-tryant's private amusement and torture park at Abu Ghraib prison? The report has been at the Pentagon for months and Rumsfeld acts as if it just showed up with his morning coffee.

Rumsfeld has been playing games for months now, using his famously opaque press conferences to spin the impression that his master plan was working inspite of a few hiccups here and there; he continued to press the notion he had a firm grip on events in Iraq. It turns out a paranoid schizophrenic has a stronger grip on reality that Rummy has about Baghdad, Fallujah or Dover AFB for that matter.

The damage is too great, short term and potentially longterm, for the president not to forcefully demonstrate to the world that responsibility and accountability mean something to this administration. If nothing else, he owes it to over 700 men and women who didn' t sacrifice their lives so Donald Rumsfeld could keep his job.



Monday, May 03, 2004

THE NATIONAL BRICKLAYERS ASSOCIATION 

The National Basketball Association stinks like day old fish under an August sun. If they showed NBA playoff games in Abu Ghraib prison, it would violate multiple articles of the Geneva Convention. Tonight, the Detroit Pistons beat the New Jersey Nets 78-56. No, you don't need Lasik Eye surgery, that is a final score in what proclaims to be the showcase of professional basketball.

Showcase? More like a head case. Yesterday I watched the Lakers-Spurs opening game of their playoff series and if I didn't know better I would have sworn I was watching the St. Sebastian Pincushions vie with the Mother Of Mary Hope & Prayers for the sixth grade CYC championship. There were more mental mistakes in that game than in an SAT test session and the foul shooting was indeed, most foul.

No one uses the fast break as a part of the offense. The entire league subscribes to a boring half-court set offense that is characterized by players banging and bumping into one another like rhino's rutting at mating season. It's Sumo wrestling in baggy shorts and sneakers. Come to think about it, there's more action in Sumo.

The player who can consistently knock down a 17-20 ft jumper is as rare as a Gay Pride Parade in downtown Baghdad. And why is that? Because the dunk become the lingua franca of hoops. Where dunking was once the privilege left to the artistry of Wilt, Dr. J and Michael, today it is the defining 'skill' for the average NBA player (that and the ability to bump and grind on defense like a lap dancer with 5 c-notes in her g-string).

And guess what? People pay mucho dinero to watch this crap at arenas across the country. I don't care if I'm a fan of the winning Pistons or Spurs, I'd still ask for my money back because there is no way the teams on the floor were the same ones I actually paid good dough to see. They must have raided the NBA doppelganger league and fielded a team of NBA look alikes; there is no way these clowns are being paid millions to impersonate professional athletes, are they?

It's obvious that the general skill levels on display (with the exception of a few players, e.g. Kobe Bryant) are vastly inferior to those who played as recently as the late 80's through the mid 90's. The game is unimaginative, dull and predictable as a Michael Jackson grand jury investigation.

The league's marketing mantra," I love this game" would be more meaningful if the players, coaches and management took it to heart.


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