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Wednesday, September 03, 2003

INLICITUS NON ITA 

The California Legislature has approved driver's licenses for illegal immigrants and Gray Davis is desperately waiting to sign the bill that he believes will give his 'no recall'effort badly needed Hispanic support. I'm not sure of the logic of Davis' thinking on that one. How illegals are somehow going to make a difference at the polls is beyond me unless he plans to introduce legislation that equates a drivers license with voter registration. By the way, Daivis vetoed the measure twice before when his political life wasn't at stake.

Lt. Gov. and candidate Cruz Bustamante has been leading the charge for licenses for illegals by claiming that it will make roads safer for all Californians by way of drivers tests. Yep, and pilots' licenses for illegal Suadis should help improve air traffic safety. But California , as always, has established a trend that the rest of the nation is fast to follow.

Alabama legislators have introduced a law that will allow Klan members to burn crosses on public property on the first and third Tuesday of any month with 30 or 31 days. The legislation mandates that if the monument to the Ten Commandments are returned to the State Supreme Court, then such special interest pyrotechnics will once again become illegal. Cross burners will be required to demonstrate proficiency with kerosene and matches prior to state licensing.

Florida lawmakers have cobbled together an act that gives Columbian drug dealers carte blanche to launder unlimited amounts of money through any state approved finanicial institution. Those institutions will be must be chosen by the president of the state senate and approved by the drug dealers in a closed session of the state finance and banking committee.

Kentucky is mulling over a new law that will give pot farmers three days of amnesty per month to sell their harvest. Now that marijuana has passed tobacco as the chief cash crop of the Commonwealth, the Kentucky Assembly has taken the initiative to realize tax benefits on the pot bonanza. Louisville native and professional drug connoissuer Hunter S. Thompson, has been named an Honorary Kentucky Colonel to oversee quality control.

Finally, Massachuessetts has given approval to provide clemency to all Kennedy spawn no matter the offense. The Bay State's governing body noted that ongoing prosecution and investigation involving various family members is costing the state the equvalent of 100 prison guards per year; a sum that could be better spent protecting pedophile priests incarcerated in the state's prisons. Kennedy family members will not have to apply for a license of any sort in order to operate autos, planes, boats or motorcycles given that said license will undoubtably be suspended in due course. They will, however, be required to submit a daily itinerary to the Boston Globe detailing their vehicle of choice and intended route for that day. This information will be available each day on the sports page featuring racing results.


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